Nickelodeon’s best game nominees include… Wii Sports!?

Nickelodeon has its finger on the pulse of kid culture

Awards shows are pretty bullsh*t. Videogame awards shows, even more so. But awards shows on children’s networks like Cartoon Network and Nickelodeon are the cream of the anal muck. They have open voting to give kids the illusion of choice, but the lists of nominees are always carefully manicured to be as PC as possible. That’s the only reason why Twilight‘s Kristen Stewart would be in the running for favorite movie actress.

And so, it’s time for Nickelodeon Kids’ Choice Awards 2013 coming March 23. There is a category for favorite videogame, and nominees include Just Dance 4, Mario Kart 7, Skylanders Giants, and Wii Sports. Wait… what? What!? WHAT!? Are you kidding me? Wii Sports came out in 2006. It has no place on this list. Was the landscape for children’s entertainment this past year so barren that Nickelodeon couldn’t pick four damn games? Who compiled this list?

But don’t think this lack of relevancy is exclusive to games. The other categories are just as curious. The cartoon section doesn’t include a single show that premiered in 2012 — Tom and Jerry is on there, for God’s sake. Same with the book section. I guess because the target audience is children, you are allowed to give them backhanded treatment.

Maybe I’m at fault for placing too much value in young people’s intelligence. Heaven forbid we treat them as human beings and not as a direct pipeline to their parents’ wallets.

KIDS’ CHOICE AWARDS 2013! – Favorite Videogame [Nickelodeon via GoNintendo]