I’m the fool – Nightdive’s PO’ed: Definitive Edition is actually real

Well, crap. Yesterday, on April Fool’s Day, Nightdive released a trailer for PO’ed: Definitive Edition. I thought they were joking. They were not.

PO’ed was first released in 1995 on the 3DO Interactive Multiplayer system before getting ported to the PS1. It’s a first-person shooter that came out to cash in on the sudden popularity of the genre in the wake of Doom. It differentiates itself by having a wacky story about a space chef fighting aliens and by including a jetpack for verticality before Duke Nukem did it. Also, one of the enemies is a walking butt, but really, when you get down to it, aren’t we all just walking butts?

I probably should have looked closer yesterday, but it’s the one day of the year when I’m trying to find what not to believe. I don’t want to drag you down the fool hole with me. PO’ed was developed on the SlaveDriver Engine, which powered Power Slave, a game that Nightdive already remastered. And as much as PO’ed is an obscure game, it wasn’t received too poorly. Definitely not great, but better than, say, William Shatner’s TekWar.

PO’ed Definitive Edition will have all the modern comforts, including 4K resolution and 144 fps on platforms that support it. They’re also throwing in bug fixes and quality-of-life features that can be toggled off if you want that real PO’ed experience.

There’s no given release date for PO’ed Definitive Edition, but the details I have say that it’s coming “in the very near future.” That’s very near! It will be releasing on PS4, PS5, Switch, Xbox One, Xbox Series X|S, and PC.