Goat Simulator 3 is going all in on co-op chaos

“The devs actually bothered to make an ending this time”

Goat Simulator 3 entered the world with a Dead Island 2 fakeout parody trailer at Summer Game Fest 2022, and the new game is coming this fall to PS5, Xbox Series X/S, and PC by way of the Epic Games Store. They’re skipping right over “2” for this direct sequel.

According to developer Coffee Stain North, Goat Simulator 3 is bringing its do-what-you-feel-like sandbox action to the island of San Angora. Best of all, there’s four-player co-op, locally and online. As intentionally dumb as Goat Simulator can be, that part actually interests me! Wacky free-roaming shenanigans can be a lot of fun with a partner.

In Goat Simulator 3, players will “cause all manner of mayhem as you lick, headbutt, crash and explode your way across the map, leaving no NPC unannoyed.”

The humor and slapdash physics may not feel particularly modern at this point — I sympathize with anyone who thinks this “simulation” has run its course — but there’s a world in which I could have some fun playing Goat Simulator 3, I think. Maybe!

I’m less interested in mini-games (there’s going to be seven types) and more on board with the idea of exploring for secrets together. I’m sure they’ll get pretty out-there with unlockable skins and “gear parts” if there are (*checks notes*) oh wow, 300 of ’em.

Sometimes, you need a shut-off-your-brain game with low stakes and the ability to make quick, tangible progress to keep you entertained. I just hope the price is right.