Fall Guys dressed up as Sonic is some real fanfic nightmare stuff

Mean Bean

Sonic, despite being a destroyer of chili dogs, keeps a pretty trim figure. He gets the cardio in, putting in enough Miles to warrant as many cheat days as he needs.

That’s why it’s moderately disturbing to see Sonic within the framework of a rotund Bean. Gaze upon this weirdness: 

The distended belly. The rounded quills. The cankles. It’s all fucked!

This could be you. Your bean could look like this. A measly 10 crowns and it’s all yours starting on October 14. Gonna be real jarring to see 60 chunky dudes waddling around with inertia working against them. The fastest always wins, so maybe this is a case of “Dress for the job you want.” Real Sonic would mop the floor with a Bean though.