Capitalism is dead: Wendy’s is the latest fast food joint to turn to gaming

Long live calorie-laden consumerism!

I’ll be the first to admit that the Arby’s Twitter handle does some really awesome stuff related to gaming. And yes, I’ll always have a soft spot for assaulting hapless victims with a meal containing 172% of your daily intake of sodium in Sneak King. And god damn it, there’s something so enticing about the prospect of a Cooking Mama-style game where you make KFC Double Downs because man, you really should have tried harder in high school.

But I think Wendy’s finally broke me.

Because nothing makes sense anymore, Wendy’s is using Twitch to advertise their french fries. Dubbed “Make It Rain Fry-Days,” Twitch viewers can use real money they earned in the real world (possibly working at Wendy’s) doing real work to buy Bits to cheer on streamers. If you’ve finally fallen into the capitalistic vortex the developed world has become, you can use these Bits during select streams to make the screen “rain french fries.”

Welcome to Hell, my friends.

I don’t know what a SpaceLyon or Wavy is, but if you watch them play video games tonight you can use your computer screen to mirror your engorged maw as you rain fried potatoes from hand to face, search bar to taskbar in a decadent orgy celebrating the flow of cash from hand, to fist, to mouth, to Twitch, indulgently lubing the cogs of consumerism with the dehydrated sweat that viscously oozes from each and every pore.

Wendy’s is currently offering their all-natural, sea salt french fries for $1 for a limited time only.