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About Me
Proud Member of DtoidPortland and Pacific Dick:

Drummer, Guitarist, Rock God. Singer on MASTER EXPLODER and Painkiller

king3vbo is (THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST) part of Failcast, the officially unofficial community podcast for Destructoid.

I'm also the Weeaboo King for WatchPlayRead, a website about all things nerd

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The Ghost is a god amongst the meng:


NEVAR FORGET THE WONDERS OF WIISUCKS:


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My Top Ten Most Hated Members of the Community
king3vbo | 1:39 PM on 03.11.2010 59 comments


I'm delaying my blog about Yakuza III's potential to change the entire gaming industry to get this out of the way and quickly.

10. Jim Sterling.
I was here before him, and he took my fat guy shtick. HEY JIM I WAS THE ORIGINAL FAT GUY

9. Snaileb
I hate you because you left me here, all alone, in the cold. Where's the love, Snaileb? Where's the love?

8. Johnny Viral
K-ON Review: 11/10. Moe, it has it. How dare you disagree with my taste in anime.

7. Xzyliac
Your name is fucking hard to pronounce, and as a simpleton I demand easy user names.

6. Cataract
I don't necessarily hate you, I just hate guidos... so call it proxy hate, or something.

5. Blehman
Blehman is an unfunny asshole who thinks parodying me is the absolute height of hilarity. Also, he decided his username based on bleh, man.

4. Chrono Trigger
Wait I love this game what am I saying

3. Puppetpallmich
He made fun of me one time in Ventrillo 2 years ago and I've never forgotten, so now I tell everyone that Vent is full of assholes when really it's full of empty chat channels

2. De Bloo
This one time he beat me at Street Figher 4, and by this one time I mean every time.

1. Necros
Dead Space. Yaris. Special Editions. So much rage.

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Sweet Mother Of God, It's Time For A Belated Secret Santa Post
king3vbo | 9:20 AM on 01.13.2010 22 comments




Look at that. That's right, look at that shit. Your jealousy knows no bounds. You can only stare at the pure, unrequited glory that is a 50 Cent: Blood On The Sand Ultra Special Edition. I mean, just look at that ball-smashing glory:

-Holy fuckbeans that's a towel with a quote written and signed by Fiddy himself, yo. Fuck yes I will let my dreamz take flight, Fiddy.
-Jesus tapdancing testicles look at that goddamn slipclover it is so baller
-Those custom ornaments will punch the shitstains right off of your Christmas tree
-Wear that crown to the club, get mad ladies all over your dick 50 Cent style
-Oh lawd, is dat a custom artbook? You bet your sweet virgin ass it is. Fiddy done drew it himself

...ok in all seriousness, this is why Dtoid Secret Santa is so awesome. The creativity and pure awesome behind this kickass gift from the glorious AgentMoo made me laugh so hard when I got it. Thanks brosef, though I'm still too scared to put the game in my Xbox, I'm afraid the game will steal all my stuff when I'm not looking.

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Why I Love Destructoid
king3vbo | 3:37 PM on 08.25.2009 25 comments




-idk my bff Dennis
-I can make posts that utilize my unique (aka akin to a 12 year old) sense of humor
-Stupid videos
-PAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAX

In all seriousness, Dtoid has been an outlet to express my nerdiness for years now, and I absolutely love it. I also love every one of you. Except Necros. Fuck that guy.

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Glad Tidings Of Birth For Samit
king3vbo | 9:21 AM on 03.16.2009 10 comments




Keep fighting the good fight, Brostation

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My milkshake brings all the 'toids to the yard
king3vbo | 5:23 PM on 01.03.2009 17 comments




My milkshake brings all the 'toids to the yard
And Coon's like "KING MAKES ME HARD!"
Also, Pew and Hollie are tards
I can beat them, I've got a Charizard

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Banjo-Kazooie Demo Impressions From A Rabid Fan
king3vbo | 1:05 PM on 10.30.2008 20 comments




I am a rabid Banjo Kazooie fan, as most of you know, and therefore I was really excited to get my hands on the Nuts and Bolts demo last night. I've been waiting so long to play a new BK game, and I'm really interested in how they've changed the gameplay.

My biggest fear was that the humor and style of the original Banjo Kazooie games would be gone, but thankfully this isn't the case. The game starts up and you hear that familiar song, and it's freakin awesome. The game still has text speech with mumbling noises coming from the characters, and Grunty still talks in rhyme. If you're a fan of the original games, that first time you enter Banjo Land and hear that music kick in... it put a huge grin on my face. Rare has really pumped up the nostalgia factor for fans of the series.

Now the gameplay... I'm still not completely sold on it. I know that you're playing the beginning of the game, and as such you have all the crappy parts, but the vehicle driving felt a little loose. It may have just been the way the car was designed, but the turning was just a little sloppy, especially if you are driving in reverse. However, I did start to get the hang of it. It was kind of weird to build an amphibious vehicle and have it turn sloppy on ground but be very perecise in water. I hope that Rare tightens up the handling on vehicles before release.



So I may not be huge on the driving, but let me tell you, the vehicle creation is freaking awesome. I spent at least an hour just building the strangest vehicles I could and then testing them out. The best part is that I only had some basic parts. I can't wait to see what kind of crazy shit I can build once I have earned all the parts in the game. The vehicle builder is really solid and allows you to just go nuts and build whatever you want. I also like that they added a laid back physics model to the vehicle. For instance, if you build a land vehicle that's top heavy, good luck making sharp turns.

Basically, I'm just as excited for this game as I was before. It may be my penchant for all things Banjo Kazooie, but I had a great time playing the demo, and I'm sure I'll sink many hours into the full game.

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