Inventory Weight Limits are a curse and a hindrance against all of humanity. They serve no purpose than to make you feel like a fatty fatty bumblestilskin and to make you have to chose what loot to needlessly and heartlessness (though it burns inside) throw away when you're miles deep in a mine or cavern and have no option but to destroy or drop a rather good item for one that's slightly better or shinier. Why though do we only have good items left to drop? Well sirs and madams because the weight limit already made us drop every piece of mediocre or shit item 3 minutes ago.



I get that IWL (as I'm deeming it now for handiness sake) is suppose to perhaps add a more realistic element to certain games, but they're games at the end of the day. Having a weight restriction isn't going to dampen the immersive elements or ruin the game for us. Plus it's inaccurate anyway. I am roaming through a wasteland, ravished by a war and the cheeky droppings of nuclear bombs. Yet somehow my weight restriction limits let me hold (invisibly I may add) a couple of bazookas and the same size missiles that accompany them, an armory of weapons, big and small, long and short, a warehouse stock of apparel, a plethora of potions, lotions and wombat meat, not to mention all the nick knacks, keys, books, notes ect that I've picked up during my adventures.

If it is suppose to be believable that I can carry all this stuff and still not look like I've got some love handle action going on, then you may as well suspend this illusion further with unlimited inventory abilities.

Some RPG’s have come out where the inventory limit was endless and it didn't cause a hindrance at all. But here I am in the middle of a poorly pronounced Irish named forest in the realms of Amalur, where you cannot blink and miss any loot, for it is everywhere. You spin around like a mage-robed ballerina and you will see between 6-8 items in the nearest vicinity that can be picked up and added to your backpack. Ah but then you also have loot that is invisible, yet marked with a red splooge on your mini map.

So when a game such as Knights of Amalur throws at you a free shopping spree of wonders to pick up to help you or customize your characters so they don't like a diseased ridden tramp, it is befuddling and slightly heartbreaking when you realise the cruel creators of the game have made it so you will never be able to take everything with you. You won't be able to pick up the never-ending supply of long swords, that if collected and traded for cash, will net you a nice profit.

You'll go to the leader of the Warsworn, looking for approval and some cash4gold or a nice useful powerful trinket, after battling a horde of ogres on his behalf.


I did this for you big-daddy hunnay

You'll tell him the good news and he'll thank you, give you your reward but wait...your inventory is full so you can't take it. Now thankfully KoA will tell you this. They'll say "oh your imaginary backpack that you can't even see is full. It's got 28 giant hammers in it, but we can't fit this magic sock". Then your reward will be left on the floor for you, to pick up when you want.

What's wrong with this? Nothing really, it's a good idea, it means you don't lose out on loot most of the time. What's wrong with it though....the act makes you look like a whore. "Here take you gold, oh wait you've prostituted yourself to other people and now your sack is full. Yeah bet you liked getting your sack filled eh. Well until you empty that dirty sack of yours, this will be left on the floor. Where you can pick it up, you filthy harlot you. Yeah bend over like the scum you are"

There's so much trouble in the world and some of us like to play games to avoid reality. We prefer to fight an onsalught of ravaging bucktooth werewolve wizards, than be subdued by the fever of real life battles, crimes and economic madness that occurs daily. We also have to live lives where we have self concious worries. So all I'm asking video game developers is...you stop adding bloody weight inventory limits and by doing so stop making the whole goddamn population of earth feel like filthy obese prostituting splooge-buckets.

It's on you game makers....it's on you to fix the world, it's problems and my sometimes roaming insanity. Seems like a totally reasonable request/answer to all sane worldy problems to me.

I'M NOT CRAZY!!!

In 2003 Bioware released a game called the Knights of the Old Republic. It came out of the blue for me. I'd never heard about it before I saw it on the shelve of a local video/game renting shop in town. A friend of mine had rented it, finished it and told me I'd probably enjoy it. So I gave it a go, rented the game for three nights and that's how my story of fanatically crazy love for the Kotor franchise begins.

I remember playing the game for 3 days and nights (almost) straight, I remember telling my folks that I wanted it badly for Christmas which was just around the corner and I remember spending all of Christmas and every day after glued to the little television in my room, playing the game, loving every moment of it and realising that for the final battle, it was wise to purchase every damn medpac you could afford.

KOTOR was an amazing game, with vivid worlds, characters you came to love and a steady reliable ship, the Ebon Hawk that would become your mobile home in the stars. Your character united with others to stop the threat posed by the Dark Lord Malak and on your journey, you would make or break new friendships, form relationships and love and find out your true destiny and that you were the once fear Darth Revan.

Knights of the Old Republic had a sequel made by Obsidian, call KOTOR II: The Sith Lords, the took place after the events of the 1st game and focused on the story of the unnamed (in the games) character of the Exile. An ally of Revan in the war against the Mandalorians who had done the seemingly impossible and severed herself from the Force. She met Kreia, a mysterious woman who later turned out to be not only one of Revan's formers mentors, but one of the three Sith Lords who had sought to purge the galaxy of the remaining Jedi.



Like the 1st game KOTOR II introduced us to characters with important evolving stories and intriguing pasts, all woven together by the force and the connection between the unknown and Revan and driven by their own personal needs and the greater story.

We were never promised a climatic sequel to cap of the stories that KOTOR had introduced us too. Bioware had given the reigns to Obsidian and Obsidian never seemed to mention anything pertaining to the Kotorverse ever since, setting their sights on other games, of a similar feel though (Alpha Protocol, Fallout: New Vegas). But I remember when I thought that Bioware might possibly give me and what so many other fans of the series had wanted for such a long time. I remember hearing words that Bioware were going to announce a project of theirs that was related to the Star Wars universe. I had hoped that it would be a KOTOR III but deep down I knew it would be. Instead what they announced was Star Wars: The Old Republic. Dropping only the 'Knights' and adding disappointment in my heart.

I had assumed that for all intents and purposes the story of the Ebon Hawks crew from both games was not going to be wrapped up, least not in game format for some time. Later on we got some comic books that would guest star characters from the two games, the a book came out entitled Revan, which told of what happened to him after the battle on the Starforge, and the defeat of Malak. I purchased the book and was hoping that though it wasn't how I dreamt of the final chapters of the story ending, that the pages within would provide some sort of closure for me. They did not. Revan's story did not end within his own book, it crossed over to an appearance in the MMO The Old Republic and even then Revan was once more left with an ambiguous ending, no one knowing where he had gone or if he was still alive.

To me my dreams of a third game were now completely dashed. They had decided to use other mediums to canonically end his tale and those of the other characters I had spent time engaging, playing with and reading up on. To me this wasn't good enough. Their story, their conclusions deserved, nay demanded a third Knights of the Old Republic game. They deserved an entire disc or two full of content to properly explain where Revan and the Exile had gone, in to the dark unknown regions of space and what they confronted and what become of their companions who had faced death several times over by their side.


These guys! They deserved more!

I never understood personally why neither Obsidian nor Bioware didn't decide to wrap up the story in game format, to give it their all. I realise other projects took precedent but in reality the fan base is still there, quite strong, quite large, from a marketing point of view a company that invested time into a great KOTOR III would have made a nice profit, especially as we live in the age of DLC everywhere for all the monies. I doubt I will ever see a Knights of the Old Republic III and have my favourite games ever be nicely concluded as a trilogy, but a girl can still dream.

While a lot of Mass Effect 3 related news at the moment is focusing quite closely, almost pervertedly so, on the ending or lack of ending, to some people, I have found myself noticing some similarities between the Mass Effect Series and a much loved television series of mine Battlestar Galactica. There are some elements of both that are similiar and bare no mention short of declaring how fanatic I am about both 'space operas' and in particular the actors involved in both. Captain Bailey is played by Michael Hogan who was Colonel Saul Tigh in Battlestar Galactica and EDI is played by Tricia Helfer, who played a variety of human like Cylon models in the show.


Bailey and Udina both decided that grey hair was soooo Mass Effect 2

With regards to EDI I do find it amusing that Helfer has been cast in a role, almost similiar to that of BSG and yet they've somehow managed to not make EDI a sexualised, God fearing interceptor of the human and synthetic race.



In BSG the Cylon model 6 was a bombshell, who used seduction as a method of infiltration and also knew actual true love within the series, with more than one character. This character was also quite in tune with the unseen forces of the show and an 'angel' chose the form of a 6 model to intervene and help plot a course for the life of Gaius Balter.

In ME3 EDI was a Cerebus made AI program that was integrated into the Normandy and began to show herself as an asset to Shepard and her crew from early on. She then became unshackled and gained some 'freedom' which was then increased in the 3rd game. EDI begats a body of her own and with that body, the current mission of saving the galaxy and her relationship with Joker, she gains more sentience, trying to assertain whether she is allowed or willingly wanting to be a free true AI.
The war between the organic life of the series and the synthetics, be they Geth or Reapers, is similiar to the war between Humanity and the Cylons. The Geth were created by oganics, the Quarian and rebelled, the Cylons were created by man and rebelled. The Geth invaded and took over their creators homeworld of Rannoch and the Cylons took over every human colony. The Quarian fleet was left to wander space and the human fleet the same, under the protection of one lone Battlestar mind you, so the Quarian fleet had a bit of an upperhand there.

The Reapers claim that they must destroy organic life, as it represents chaos, in the final moments of ME3 we are left with a slightly confusing and paradoxical 'revelation' that the Reapers always destroy life, in order to stop life...from...being...destroyed.
In Battlestar Galactica, the Cylons originally destroyed humanity because they believed they earned the right after being slaves to humanity, but as time passed their reasonings and beliefs changed. Some Cylons thought that the answer was the assimilate together, some believed that they had to save humanity because God willed it, they saw themselves as the true children of God and humanity was misguided in religion (monotheism) and their actions. The Cylons believed that in annihilating humanity they had saved them from a worse fate.

Both the Reapers and the Cylons have a firm doctrine they follow of cycles and repetition, the Reapers have swept the galaxies in an unrelenting cleansing process for many cycles and because they have never been stopped, they believe that the cycle itself speaks for the truth of things. The Cylons are often found saying "All this has happened before and it will happen again". The synthetic homeworld of BSG, Kobol was host to human like models who were destroyed by the non human skinned Cylons in a nuclear war. Then the same cycle repeated against humanity. Both Mass Effect and Battlestar have the repetition of cycles and repeated mistakes wedged deep into their lore.

Depending on how you view it or the theories that have come out with the finale of Mass Effect 3, Shepard is essentially a chosen one. Chosen only because of her encounter with the Prothean device on Eden Prime, mind you. But nonetheless there is something special about Shepard, an ability to unite forces, to see things others can not and to continue fighting. Shepard has been touched by forces that not many can understand. To me I see similarities between the character of Shepard and a few in Battlestar, mainly President Laura Roslin and Kara Thrace aka Starbuck. Roslin became the leader of the human colonies that survived the holocaust of the Cylon attacks and Kara Thrace was one of the best soliders and pilots in the Colonial Fleet. But both women were subject to their fates being invisibily woven and their paths being set out, whether they like it or not. Roslin was prophesied to be the 'dying leader' that would bring humanity to their homeplace and thus save them.

Starbuck was never a firm believer in the visions of her President, yet undertook dangerous tasks based on them, that helped the fleet survive and get to the next stage of survival. Starbuck herself then became much more than a fetching tool or solider, without realising it she herself had a prophesy, she was the "Harbinger of death" and "would lead humanity to their end". Starbuck died in a maelstorm and came back again, though not as we or her would know it. Shepard died and was brought back to life, with a new purpose and new 'shell' as well. Starbuck new mission after her so called ressurection was to lead humanity home, Shepards was to stop humanity from being wiped out by the Reapers. Both women are somehow involved in the notion of Harbinger of Death (no I'm not going to make a reference to Harbinger being the Reaper, you thought I was eh.)


awww yeah dat ass

In the end Starbuck was an angel or something. She helped lead humanity and some Cylons to a new planet, 'our' Earth and then when he mission was complete, she vanished, possibly passing on and up into that cockpit in the sky. Shepard was elevated and brough to a seemingly surreal plane and made her decision, then what became of her? We've yet to truly know.

ME3 worlds habour their own unique aspects and also tidbits of racism. The Turians and Salarians worked together to create the genophage which kinda upset the Krogans a bit...or a lot. Inhabitants of various Colonial worlds have no love for each other, the people of the less technologically advance, exploited Sagittaron, held no love for capital planets of the priviledged like Caprica.

There are other little bits here and there that bare similarities between ME3 and BSG, but for me it's just been a slight labor of love to compare one of my favourite television shows and my favourite games together. I mean I could throw in there how the ending of Battlestar still had a lot of ambiguity involved...much like how the ending of Mass Effect 3 was one huge ominious unclosed mindfrak.
But I won't...oh wait...

There have been so many articles and blog entries posted here and on the internet in general regarding all areas of Mass Effect 3. Now whilst the game itself has knowingly or not (though I suspect the former) welcomed an onslaught of content to be written about, I am going to focus on my own personal ‘adventure’ with the actual acquiring of the game and the shit that went down with it.

Mass Effect 3 for me was an entirely enjoyable, fulfilling (up until the last moment) experience. I found it to be a masterpiece in its own right, putting it beside Knights of the Old Republic. (though KOTOR will never be topped)
But the days that led up to the games release and the actual day of release itself were not enjoyable for me at all.

I had initially heard that all pre-ordered copies of the game were no longer valid or basically they didn’t exist, from friends. It had been announced via Eurogamer and then other sites. I had only received an email from Gamestation telling me the truth much later on in the evening. So the rush began, finding places that now had N7 Edition and choosing which one to buy from. I wanted the game as soon as possible. I had been a fan of this series before it even hit the shelves and this climax was my little treat to myself.
I finally ordered with Amazon, paid £7 extra for expedited shipping (so I would get the game on launch day, the 9th). People who had ordered with Shopto, received their copy a day earlier. I tried to order with them, but alas their whole site decided to have an epileptic seizure and the process of ordering went out the window…epileptically.

The 9th of March came and I woke up early, as if it were Christmas. The doorbell rang and it was general post, bills and other fun stuff. Hours went by and it was now 3pm, the doorbell rang, it was a neighbour asking us if our toilet was blocked. I said no and she left, as if upset that only her P&P activities were being hindered. The doorbell rang a 3rd time at 4pm and a box was delivered. I assumed it was mine and starting tearing into the package. I saw that it was Mass Effect 3 and then I saw it was for PS3. I nearly excavated my anal region. Then I saw the name on the package. It was for my housemate. I sheepishly knocked on his door, explained why his package looked like it had been chewed on and left with disappointment, secretly hating him. But not really.

It was 6pm and I rang Amazon. They were apologetic & didn’t seem to know why there was a delay. I rang the delivery company and similar confused sentiments were exchanged. 7.30pm hit and the doorbell rang, a grumpy looking man threw a package at me and asked me to sign. I raised an eyebrow and said about time. He huffed and left.

Then I began to open my box, which was already quite dented. The fun began there and by fun I mean complete and utter fucknuggetry.

The game was bruised, dented and right royally smashed. A suspicious looking footprint like mark was on the exterior of the entire package. Methinks delivery man was chastised and took his anger out on my special box. No jokes, please super serial here.





I delicately opened the game and the case was shattered and cracked, the hinge completely abused and it broke in half.



I spent a long time talking to Amazon who were apologetic and said all they could do was refund me and give me a voucher. I thought I would have no choice but to find a regular copy of the game and my heart wasn’t even in it at the moment. I was actually upset (sad I know, it’s only a game but fuck you you judgemental panda). Anyway my lovely mother found a copy on Sainsbury’s, as all other searches proved useless. I ordered I and had to wait another 5 days to get ME3. The only pro of this whole thing is I got double the DLC, because to FUCK with all those that messed up and distributed it accordingly. In hindsight I should of made people wrestle butt-nekkid with dolphins, but I think that idea might have gotten slightly illegal. When I finally got to plat ME3 thankfully I dived into the game and became engrossed instantly and my love for it came back at full strength and up until the ending (which wasn’t even an ending apparently) I enjoyed every moment. The only complaint I have is that I apparently am a whore and broke Liara’s heart. But baby I’ll make it up to you in my 2nd play through and buy you some nice knickers from Amazon <3


Yeah baby ….oh shit I’m sorry Liara ;_;

So yeah that might not be interesting to some, but it was a bit of a hectic ordeal for me. Something that should have been so simple, something I truly enjoy was made complicated and stressful. I just hope that for all that grief and the persistent support of the game Bioware do what’s right and give me the DLC I deserved. Chakwas Orgy missions.

This will be my last blog entry solely related to Bioware. I can't promise that in the future I won't reference them or have chunks, but I'll only do so if it's relevant to whatever topic I'm yammering on about. Mass Effect 3 will be out soon and so I'll be in hermit mode anyway. Perhaps I'll write a review on ME3, though I don't know if I'll be off my potential high soon enough after finishing it to be coherent. Hence the title of this being 'exhaling', to denote me getting it off my chest and freeing my Oxygen levels up for other gaming pursuits.

Anyway my final thoughts leading up to the release of ME3 can be found here (because I DID)
Exhaling Mass Effect 3

I have a few games I've to play, some old and some new. The new ones I've written about in a not so past blog. I have also to play the Witcher I on PC (though I'm having odd installation problems), such as the game is invisible on my laptop.

There's Indiana Jones and the Infernal Machine, a game I bought years ago when it was first released but my computer couldn't play it, because of the graphics card and so I sadly exchanged it. But all was not lost, for I got Age of the Empires II in it's place, which was and is a superb game. I went through a nostalgia trip and got the big box edition (I miss big box PC games).


I am currently running through Duke Nukem 3D(AGAIN) but this time recording it. I have Deus Ex Invisble War to complete (recording it too).

I am contemplating redoing Mass Effect 2but I don't know if I can be bothered, because I maxed out my ship and my characters in my last save and cannot be bothered mining ect to do it all over again.

I was originally all set to purchase Alan Wake: American Night but now I think I'll wait a while. It seems to be too short on content and the story doesn't peak my interest as much as the Alan Wake one did, though I do have The Signal DLC to finish in the original and if that goes well I may purchase The Writer

Guhhhhhhhhh

Well that's it right now. That wasn't fascinating at all, but it's a lazy weekend dammit.

It's an oldie and a classic. The story of a hero who sets out to redeem themselves and in doing so saves millions of lives and atones for the sins of their past. But even an oldie can still make for a great story, especially when you spice it up with a twist. What is you were a random person, a soldier, a rogue or a scout, who thought they knew who they were. What if you suddenly were forced to traverse the galaxy to stop a terrible threat to everyone and then halfway through your journey you realise you were, at one time, that threat and could still be.

This is the story of Revan, the protagonist of the Knights of the Old Republic and the climactic scenes of this epic expertly and beautifully woven tale is one of the finest examples of game endings in the history of video games.



From a game play point of view, you will by the finale act have become a powerful Jedi or Sith, through training and reawakening of your latent repressed powers. You will battle through hordes of robotic sentinels and dark side forces, even coming face to face with your recently lost friend or lover Bastila Shan, deciding when the battle is over whether to help redeem them or strike them down for falling to the dark side so easily, when they preached so heavily against it and its servants.



You realise who you are and that you must go to a large weaponized space station capable of churning an almost unlimited amount of fighting vessels, to stop your old apprentice, enemy and now would-be destroyer of the Republic Malak. Oh yes and you yourself were the person who reactivated the station long ago with the same intentions of destruction. Upon crash landing on an unknown planet, populated by the Rakata and finding out some further startling information, you journey up to the Star Forge to fulfil your destiny. You take with you two of your most trustee companions and fight your way through the levels of the massive weapon factory in the stars, mowing down an seemingly unrelenting wave of robots, androids and sith. You realise that it was a good idea to by every medpac, advance medpac and review kit, you found throughout the worlds you visited in the game, because everyone of them will be needed. You are grateful that you took the time to upgrade your lightsaber and those of your party and whether it provides adequate defense for you or not, you feel powerful and a true force wielder as you battle in your Jedi/Sith robes.

Eventually you will find Bastila and duel. You will, if you chose so, try between pauses, to reason with her, to reach out and pull her back to the Light. If you are successful she will become the Bastila you remember and use her incredibly powerful, war changing Battle Meditation powers to change the course of the ride of the battle that is also taking place in the space around the Star Forge between Malak’s forces and the Republic. Her aid will be the deciding factor about who will win and who will lose.



You journey on, alone, to confront Malak. The Sith Lord will taunt you, foolishly proclaiming that he has surpassed you, but through out the game you have realised the truth. That Darth Revan was one of the most powerful people in the Galaxy and still is and that you are that once-upon a time Darth Lord. Malak will absorb the force from almost lifeless corpses he has kidnapped and strung up along the platform you fight him on. Your best and wisest bet is to release these poor victims from their torment and in doing so prevent Malak from being able to replenish his health. It’s a desperate rush between avoiding Malak’s power and taking each pod out. Then all that is left is a battle between two Darths and there can only be one winner. Even when you’ve defeated Malak your choices do not end there. How you finish him will reflect on what you’ve become and learned, showing him mercy or spite as he finally dies. You then leave the Star Forge accompanied by Bastila and a worried, loyal Carth Onasi and board the sturdy Ebon Hawk, a party member in its own right and join the republic battle.

The final scenes of the game, depending on your choices leading up to the climax and those made at the very end, are ones of victory. Be it the victory of the Dark Side as you chose to take down the Republic and resume your mantle as Dark Lord of the Sith or that of saviour, as you aid the Republic, redeem the evil deeds of your past and be renowned, alongside the friends and companions you have made throughout the course of the game, as heroes and beacons of hope for the future of every good person in the galaxy.